“Social class” is the classification of people, mainly determined by their income. Usually there are 4 groups, upper, middle, working, and lower. Social class can also be reflected by people’s values, such as views of money, food, relationships, and education. In this article When Richer Weds Poorer, the relationship between two people from different social classes is introduced. Mr. Croteau, a man from working class who was selling cars, and Ms. Woolner, a woman from upper class who has a master’s degree in counseling fell in love and got married. There were common things about them, such as each of them having their own two children and some common hobbies. However there are many differences, not only their religions and income, but more importantly, more subtle things. This article talks about the problems and conflicts between them, caused by the differences other than money. And they are the balance of power in relationship, different values on spending money, views on children’s education, and difference in the way of communicating. These influenced especially Mr. Croteau.
Usually, the one who has more money will have more control and power in the relationship, and usually it’s men that have more money. However in Mr. Croteau and Ms. Woolner’s case, he is from working class while she from upper class; therefore Ms. Woolner has more power in their family. Even before Mr. Croteau moved in to live with Ms. Woolner, she gave him money to buy a car, paid for debts, and paid for a 10,000$ computer course for his career. Even her son Isaac knows about their class difference and power difference, as he said “I always think of my mom as having the power in the relationship.” (Pg3) This brought change on their relationship and marriage, since now women and men’s power in a family is totally different. The difference on the value of spending money is another factor that influences their marriage. When they paid money to join a workshop on cross-class relationship, Mr. Croteau felt it was a luxury and a bit weird to pay someone to tell your troubles to others. However, it was ordinary for Ms. Woolner. Same thing, when Ms. Woolner lost her debt card in New York City, she felt extremely anxious about being disconnected with her money. As Mr. Croteau explains, “She had real discomfort, even though we were around the corner from her mother, and she had enough money to do anything we were likely to do, assuming she wasn't planning to buy a car or a diamond all of a sudden,” It was so difficult for Mr. Croteau to understand her point of view. This might also be causing small conflicts when they try to make some decisions about spending money.
Mr. Croteau and Ms. Woolner realize the difference of their children’s education diploma, which had greater influence especially on Mr. Croteau. His kids Lael, 27, being a graduate school, and Maggie, 25, who has three jobs in her college both didn’t go to private universities like the kids of Ms. W. He began thinking about if his children had higher, qualified goals, they would have be able to have a lot more opportunities. However for Ms. Woolner and her children, they don’t really notice, since they never worried about money.
The biggest influence to Mr. Croteau is the nuance in communicating. When he was working in Northfield Mount Hermon as a communications manager, he “didn’t understand their nuances, and didn’t make a single friend there. (Pg4) On contrary when he was working in the hospital, since the people round him was all working class level, same as him. As he communicated with upper class people, he found that their dictions and attitudes toward things are different. ‘Where’s the job?’ ‘We have a deadline, you can’t do business like that.’ said Mr. Croteau when the vendor told him that it’s going to be delayed. Then Mr. Croteau’s supervisor told him that people usually don’t yell at vendors. This means that lower or working class people say things directly, with direct words, whereas upper class people usually express things euphemistically. He is confused about the nuances that he’d never though of before, therefore a little worried whether he can be used to a totally different world or not.
To conclude, the influences Mr. Croteau experienced because of the cross-class relationship between Ms. Woolner are the power of his wife over his, different values on money, education, and communication. Though they have such many numbers of subtle differences to overcome, they said in the last of the article that “I think we’re always both amazed that we’re working it out.” If two people love each other, they’ll be able to overcome the obstacles in front of them.
Usually, the one who has more money will have more control and power in the relationship, and usually it’s men that have more money. However in Mr. Croteau and Ms. Woolner’s case, he is from working class while she from upper class; therefore Ms. Woolner has more power in their family. Even before Mr. Croteau moved in to live with Ms. Woolner, she gave him money to buy a car, paid for debts, and paid for a 10,000$ computer course for his career. Even her son Isaac knows about their class difference and power difference, as he said “I always think of my mom as having the power in the relationship.” (Pg3) This brought change on their relationship and marriage, since now women and men’s power in a family is totally different. The difference on the value of spending money is another factor that influences their marriage. When they paid money to join a workshop on cross-class relationship, Mr. Croteau felt it was a luxury and a bit weird to pay someone to tell your troubles to others. However, it was ordinary for Ms. Woolner. Same thing, when Ms. Woolner lost her debt card in New York City, she felt extremely anxious about being disconnected with her money. As Mr. Croteau explains, “She had real discomfort, even though we were around the corner from her mother, and she had enough money to do anything we were likely to do, assuming she wasn't planning to buy a car or a diamond all of a sudden,” It was so difficult for Mr. Croteau to understand her point of view. This might also be causing small conflicts when they try to make some decisions about spending money.
Mr. Croteau and Ms. Woolner realize the difference of their children’s education diploma, which had greater influence especially on Mr. Croteau. His kids Lael, 27, being a graduate school, and Maggie, 25, who has three jobs in her college both didn’t go to private universities like the kids of Ms. W. He began thinking about if his children had higher, qualified goals, they would have be able to have a lot more opportunities. However for Ms. Woolner and her children, they don’t really notice, since they never worried about money.
The biggest influence to Mr. Croteau is the nuance in communicating. When he was working in Northfield Mount Hermon as a communications manager, he “didn’t understand their nuances, and didn’t make a single friend there. (Pg4) On contrary when he was working in the hospital, since the people round him was all working class level, same as him. As he communicated with upper class people, he found that their dictions and attitudes toward things are different. ‘Where’s the job?’ ‘We have a deadline, you can’t do business like that.’ said Mr. Croteau when the vendor told him that it’s going to be delayed. Then Mr. Croteau’s supervisor told him that people usually don’t yell at vendors. This means that lower or working class people say things directly, with direct words, whereas upper class people usually express things euphemistically. He is confused about the nuances that he’d never though of before, therefore a little worried whether he can be used to a totally different world or not.
To conclude, the influences Mr. Croteau experienced because of the cross-class relationship between Ms. Woolner are the power of his wife over his, different values on money, education, and communication. Though they have such many numbers of subtle differences to overcome, they said in the last of the article that “I think we’re always both amazed that we’re working it out.” If two people love each other, they’ll be able to overcome the obstacles in front of them.